MiddleSpot / Journal prompts for couples

Thirty journal prompts for couples

Most couples talk about logistics, or about the day. These are for the other talk. Write your answer on your own, then swap and read each other’s. It works the same whether you share a kitchen or a time zone.

Everyday things

Small questions, so the answers can be honest.

What was the best part of your day, and the part you would redo?
What is something small I did this week that you noticed?
What is something you wanted to tell me today and did not?
What made you feel looked after recently?
What is something you do alone that you secretly enjoy?
What do you wish we did on a normal Tuesday?
When did you last feel really rested?
What are you looking forward to this week?
What is a worry you have been carrying that I might not know about?
What is a small ritual of ours that you would hate to lose?

Us

A little more tender. Read the answer before you reply to it.

What is a moment from the last year that you want us to keep?
What did you think of me the first time we met?
When do you feel closest to me?
What is something I do that you find easy to love?
What is something you find hard to ask me for?
What did you not understand about me at first that you do now?
What have we been through that you are proud of us for?
What is something about us that other people would not guess?
How do you like to be comforted when you are upset?
What is a question you have wanted to ask me for a while?

What comes next

For a Sunday evening, or the start of a year.

What do you want more of in the next year?
What is a trip, small or large, you would like us to take?
What would a good ordinary day look like in five years?
What is something you would like us to learn together?
What do you want us to stop putting off?
What are you afraid we will stop doing?
What would you change about how we spend our evenings?
What is something you would like me to ask you about more?
What do you hope people say about us?
What is one thing you want to remember about this year?

How to use them

One a week. Thirty is a good half year. Pick the one that fits the week instead of going in order.
Write first, then swap. Answering at the same time, without seeing the other’s, keeps either of you from matching the other’s tone.
Say what you liked. Before you reply to an answer, say one thing in it that you did not know. It keeps it from turning into a review.

Do it without remembering to

MiddleSpot sends the question for you. Start a journal with your partner, choose a question every week, two weeks or month, and each page opens once you have both written. There are no photos and no streaks to keep alive. Your first shared journal is free.

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Questions about couples journaling

What should couples write about in a shared journal?

Small, specific things: what you noticed this week, what you meant to say, what you are looking forward to. Specific beats big. The big answers tend to arrive on their own once the small ones have become easy.

How often should we write?

As often as you will keep doing it. Once a week is plenty for most couples. A rhythm you keep is worth more than a daily plan that lasts ten days.

Do we need to answer at the same time?

No. In a shared journal each page waits until both of you have written, so you can write when it suits you.